Jaypaw's Obsession
by Cookies and Waffles
Summary: Jaypaw is awfully entranced with his new stick, and it may create some problems during a day that could have played out normally. Oneshot. Rated T because I can't avoid cursing because my life is sad like that. Created in five minutes of pure bliss and terror.


The light-brown tabby she-cat stared off into the sky. "It's about to rain," she commented to her blind apprentice.

The blind cat turned his head in her direction and muttered sarcastically, "Rain, Leafpool? You don't say?" through clenched teeth.

If Leafpool had heard this reply she didn't show it in any way. "Jaypaw, bite through a few more stems and we'll carry our supplies back to camp. It looks like it's gonna come down pretty hard, and I'd like to hurry." she bent her head to pick up her own stack of herbs for the Thunderclan medicine stock.

Jaypaw's pelt bristled in annoyance. Any normal cat would have been okay in these conditions. His mentor was clearly worried about him just because he was blind, and to Jaypaw, this made absolutely no sense. "Hang on," he replied, somewhat successfully hiding the irritation in his voice. "just let me get the stick to somewhere safe." The blind cat was sliding his paws against the wood, his pads and claws running smoothly along the perfectly scored lines.

Jaypaw sensed with his weird blind cat powers that the tabby bitch was glaring at him. He felt her irritation pierce the calmness as she let out an annoyed mew. "We don't have time for you to drag that to safety. The rain is coming, and we need to get these herbs to camp without drenching them."

Jaypaw didn't find either of those reasons valid. The rain would not affect him, and the plants were already half-submerged in lake water to begin with. The young apprentice didn't point this out to the hag. _I mean like, seriously, who the hell even gets anywhere by arguing with this bitch?_ Jaypaw thought bitterly. When he did not respond, Leafpool continued.

"Plus, you could do without the stupid stick. You've been very creepily caressing it and it needs to stop before the other clans think you ate fermented berries."Jaypaw wheeled around and glared in the general direction of the medicine cat. He couldn't pinpoint her location exactly, but his eyes were angry and Leafpool guessed it was because of her, so she kinda got the hint that he was angry… one would think that this would be easier to write if he wasn't blind, but I am able to work with what was given to me…

Anywho, the blind apprentice's pelt continued to bristle with indignation, and he was able to put the words together to try to defend his beloved stick. "How dare you call my stick stupid?" he mewed in anger. His sightless gaze turned to a loving yet somewhat wistful expression, and he said in a softer tone, "This stick _is_ me." Jaypaw left out that he _had_ eaten fermented berries, then passed out for over an hour behind highledge, just to blame his absence on constipation from corrupted fresh-kill.

Jaypaw sensed his mentor's piercing glare and it made every hair on his pelt raise in discomfort. She inhaled as if about to speak, but quickly gave up on speaking all together as she continued to glare at her drunk apprentice.

Jaypaw crouched down next to the stick and lovingly nuzzled it. "I don't care what they say, Stick— we were meant to be together." He began to lap at the stick. The tom ignored Leafpool's feeling of discomfort. Voices came whispering through his head as the spirit of Fallen Leaves spoke to him.

 _For the love of Starclan or any group of dead cat spirits you hold dear, just please, stop licking the fucking stick._

Jaypaw's eyes narrowed in defiance and he began to lick it even more furiously.

 _Please stop violating the stick. We can feel everything it can. You're practically molesting our disembodied souls._

At this the grey tom sighed and willingly stopped licking the stick. He didn't want to have a bad reputation among dead cats— for Starclan's sake, they were half of the people he talked to. Jaypaw got to his feet.

Leafpool stepped towards her apprentice and spoke softly. "Please, Jaypaw, stop it with the stick." she said gently.

Jaypaw felt waves of emotion come off of her. "None of us know what we've done wrong… just please… be normal." Leafpool choked out as she rested her tail tip on his shoulder.

The young tom pulled back from her touch. "How dare you criticize my relationship with the stick.?" He spat, his pelt bristling and his claws unsheathed.

Leafpool's fur prickled with discomfort. "Jaypaw, you're scaring me…"

At this point, Jaypaw picked up the scent of a Windclan patrol watching with interest from across the border, but he didn't care.

"Good! Embrace the fear!" Jaypaw mewed, a wild look entering his sightless expression. "It's natural! FEAR IS NATURAL! **THE STICK IS NATURAL!"** the tom was now yowling as loud as he could manage, his head turned towards the skies as he glared maniacally at it.

Leafpool stared at him in fear and confusion as she cowered back. She lashed her tail, and Jaypaw's head jerked directly toward her.

The she-cat shrunk back even more and hissed in fear as the upset young tom let out another loud mewl. "DANCE WITH ME LEAFPOOL!" he demanded. "DANCE THE DANCE OF LIFE!" Leafpool's apprentice continued to grab the end of the stick in his mouth and twirl himself in frantic circles, all the while a low growl was sounding from his throat. Jaypaw picked up the speed, and soon he was swinging the large object around over Leafpool's head as he continued to spin wildly.

This process continued for a short amount of time before the insane apprentice suddenly collapsed, dropping the stick beside him. Leafpool sighed. She began to drag the cat towards the camp, but before she left, made sure to cast the stick into the lake.


End file.
